Welcome to Short Sardar Jokes!
A short starter joke:
A man walks in to a library and asks "Where are the books
on suicide?"
The librarian says "Down that aisle, then left then right."
So he follows her instructions but he could not find what he
was looking for. So he goes back to the lady and she takes
him down the aisle and goes left and than right and the
books were not there. "I'm sorry," she says "those damn
people never bring them back!"
Sardar Terrorists
There were two Sardarjis Bantya and Santya as bombers. They
had to place a time bomb in order to explode a building. So
they were going on their destination in a car. On their way
Bantya asked Santya, "Santya what will happen if the time
bomb explodes in this car itself." Santya replied
"Don't worry, I have a spare one!!!!!
Dangerous Buddy
A paki goes to the doctor and as he touches every part of her body with her finger she
says, "Doctor it hurts everywhere. My leg hurts, my arm hurts, my neck hurts, and
even my head hurts!" The doctor asks, "Where you ever a friends with a Sardar?"
"Yes I was." he replies. "why do you ask?"
The doctor answers, "because your finger is broken!"
Dead Bird
A Sardar and a paki were walking outside when the paki said, "Oh look at the dead
bird."
The Sardar looked skyward and said, "Where, where?"
This is is a letter from a sardarji mother to her
son at school ...
Pyaarey Puttar,
Vahe Guru. I am writing this letter slow because I
know you can't read fast. We don't live where we
did when you left home. Your dad read in the
newspaper that most accidents happen 20 miles
from your home, so we moved! I won't be able to
give you the address as the last sardar who stayed
in this house took the numbers with them for their
next house, so they wouldnt have to change their
address.
This place is really nice. It even has a washing
machine. I'm not sure it works too well, last week
I put in three shirts and pulled the chain and I
HAVE NOT SEEN THEM SINCE.
THE weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice
last week. The first it rained for three days and the
second time for four days. The coat you wanted me
to send you, your aunt said it would be a little too
heavy to send in the mail with all the buttons, so we
cut them off and put them in the pocket.
We got another bill from the funeral home. It said
that if we don't make the last payment on
GRANDMA'S FUNERAL, she will come up again.
Your father has another job. He has 500 men under
him. He is cutting the grass in the cemetery. Your
sister had a baby this morning, I havent found out
whether it is a boy or girl, so I don't know whether
you are an aunt or uncle!
Your uncle jatindar fell into a whiskey vat. Some
men tried to pull him out, but he fought them off
and drowned. We cremated him and he burned for
3 days.
Three of your friends went off the bridge in a
pick-up truck. One was driving and the other two
were in the back. the driver got out, he rolled down
the window and swam to safety. the other 2 friends
drowned because they couldn't get the gate down.
there isn't much more news at this time. nothing much has happened.
love, mom
p.s. i was going to send you some money, but the
envelope was already sealed.
Pres. Singh Singh buys some common sense
This is about a day when Mr. Zail Singh was the President of
the country.
All sardars in the country went to him this day and told him
that people
tease them by making jokes about them that when the clock
stucks 12:00,
all sardars go mad and act like crazy. They complained that
this is not
true. They also complained that people talk about sardar
having no common
sanse. Therefore, they demanded him to go bring for them
common sense.
Mr. Zail Singh was confused and asked his secretary to give
him some suggestions. The secretary advised him to go to Japan, since quality is
guaranteed.
The next day Mr. Zail Singh rushes off to Japan. At the
Osaka Airport he
hires a cab and asks him to take him to a shop where he
can get common sense.
The cab driver was pissed, he told him that there is no shop
in Japan that sells such stuff. Infact every human being has common sense since birth. And
that one should know how to make use of it. Mr. Zail Singh asked him to explain in detail.
He started explaining by giving an example. The example was
that there are 4 members in his family, his wife, his son, and
his daughter. He then
asked Mr. Zail Singh to guess the fourth members of the
family. Mr. Zail Singh said, "How am i supposed to know
who is the forth member in your
family". The driver said, "fool, its me"
Mr. Zail then understood and said,"oh! is this what common
sense is?,
Indian sardars are fools and stupid, this is so easy"
The next day he goes back to India and announces all
sardars to get together for a mass sardar lunch. He starts
explaining with the same example. He says," there are 4
members in my family, my son, my daughter, and my wife,
guess who is the fourth one?". All sardars shouted,
"We don't know".
He then yells at them,"You fools, stupid, good for nothing. It
is so simple, the fourth member of the family is that taxi
driver"
Sardarji Takes Art Class
One Day, A sardarji went to take an art class. His
art teacher gave the assignment that he must paint
something. The sardarji did not know what to
paint, so the teacher told him to paint that which
he felt was the most beautiful thing in the world.
The sardarji thought, Nothing can be more
beautiful than my village, so I shall paint that.
The sardarji spent all his time working on the
painting the next day. He did not eat, sleep, or
take a bath.
Finally, he took the painting to his art teacher.
His art teacher was amazed at the detail of the
picture, but he said, "No, no, there is something
missing. Go back to your village and see what you
have missed."
The sardarji went back to his village and revised his
painting. The next day in class, he returned with
the painting. He presented a black canvas to
his instructor. His instructor said, "What! You fool!
I said revise not destroy!"
The sardarji said, "Well you told me to paint what I
was missing, so I went back to the village, and looked
for a long time. Then, there was a power outage, so I
thought to myself this is what I am missing, so I painted
black!"
A Sardar Computer Illiterate
True story from a Novell NetWire SysOp:
Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"
Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am
within my warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed?"
Tech: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
Tech: "Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped, It's
because
I am. Did you receive this as part of a promotional, at a
trade
show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it have
any trademark
on it?"
Caller: "It came with my computer, I don't know
anything about a
promotional. It just has '4X' on it."
At this point the Tech Rep had to mute the caller, because
he couldn't stand it.
The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM
drive as a cup holder,
and snapped it off the drive!